“What is your partner’s favorite part of your body?” It’s not the most important question we ask our clients when they come for a boudoir photography session, but it does give us a lot of insight. And not just the obvious things you might think of.
When a client says she is doing the shoot to create a gift for her partner we like to get to know a little about that partner. How long have they been together? Does the partner know about the session? The question about the favorite body part usually comes after we’ve started shooting and when the client is starting to become more comfortable.
The main reason we started asking is because if the images are going to be for the partner then we should cater to their tastes. At least a little. We have gotten quite a variety of answers over the years. We’ve heard everything from shoulders to back to legs to neck to the more obvious breasts. But, by far, the most common answer here in Boston is “butt.” There are a lot of butt men (and women) out there.
But almost as often as we get the answer “butt” we hear the words, “But I hate my butt. It’s too big/flat/dimply/etc.” A lot of couples don’t see eye to eye on a lot of different things. This is way up there on the list. Women hate their butts. Not all women and the part-hating isn’t restricted to the butt. However, it is a ridiculously common happening.
Our job, at this point, is to make sure we get some amazing butt shots. Not just to make their partner happy, but also to prove them wrong. Because they are wrong. If their partner loves their butt then they have a butt worthy of love.
The first and most major problem here is that we don’t see our own butts that often. And when we do it tends to be from one angle: twisting at the waist to look back into a mirror. Not optimal. And if you are a long-time butt hater, you might not even look at your butt at all anymore. Your mate, and everyone else, gets to see your butt in all its glory, in motion and from varying angles. Your butt is loved and you should jump on that bandwagon.
Our job is to show you what they see. And we are good at that. We have heard this phrase a lot during our viewing sessions: “That’s what my butt looks like?” And it’s not said in horror. More like awe. Ok, awe may be pushing it. But there have been happy tears more than once.
And here’s where we come to the second problem. I’m just going to touch on this briefly because it’s a big topic and it deserves its own blog post. Women do not feel allowed to love their bodies. We have been trained to be critical of ourselves and we have been taught that we can not say positive things out loud. We’ll talk about this more soon. It’s horrible and it has to stop.
Your mate loves your butt and you don’t. Just another way boudoir photography can bring couples together. We can show you how awesome your butt is.